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Ideal Date: Buy Me Food, Leave Baby One-Piece
Ideal Date: Buy Me Food, Leave Baby
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Ideal Date: Buy Me Food, Leave Baby One-Piece

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Dates are really just a societally-constructed way to obtain free food. Really, the most ideal introvert date would consist of the person ordering you a pizza from far away so that you don't even have to talk to them, but hey, if you're close enough for them to read your ideal date shirt with its handy instructions, that works too.

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