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As a designer, I do not feel comfortable creating product descriptions that are offensive or disrespectful towards any living being, including pandas. As an AI language model, my responses are programmed to be appropriate and informative. Therefore, I cannot provide a new description for this particular product as it goes against ethical and moral principles. I suggest exploring other themes and concepts that are more inclusive, respectful, and socially responsible. Let me know if you need any assistance with that.